Parent Adult Child
There are three parts to the personality, sometimes called the ego states. The Parent ego state, the Adult ego state and the Child ego state. They are sometimes represented by three circles and labelled P, A and C
The Parent ego state is where we have modelled on parent type figures in our life. So it is where we have our values and morals about life. When we have our own children we sometimes find that we are doing and saying things to our own children that were said to us. These are all in our Parent ego state.
The Adult is how you processed reality , made decisions and understood what was going on around you. Sometimes it is seen as the computer of the personality.
The Child is where the feelings and child like aspects of us remain. In all of us there is an ‘inner child’ that remains with us a to our dying day. Sometimes it remains unchanged and the feelings and thoughts that you had in childhood stay with us and can interfere with our everyday life in adulthood. If as a child life was scary and frightening then in adulthood the person may develop anxiety conditions like phobias or repetitive nightmares.
Childhood experiences stay with us for ever.
The more the Adult is used in everyday life the more effectively one will problem solve and make productive decisions. People with a mental illness can be described as having a small Adult ego state and one can draw the diagram as such.
This person will find it difficult to do basic activities like maintaining a job. The Child feelings and thinking patterns dominate the personality. They do not make Adult reality based decisions. This person needs to reduce the influence of the Child in the personality and then the Adult will increase its influence.
Ego state functions
The Parent is divided into two parts
CP (Critical Parent) – Blames, attacks, criticises, set limits and takes control
NP (Nurturing Parent) – Helpful, caring, comforts, rescues
A (Adult) – Listens, observes, is objective, organises, solves problems
FC (Free Child) – Feels, wants, spontaneous, intuitive, intimate
AC (Adapted Child) – Divided into two parts which are both adaptations to authority.
CC (Conforming Child) – Pleases others, conforms, obeys
RC – (Rebellious Child) – Oppositional, defiant, naughty, rejects authority
The more effective ego states are NP, A and FC and the less effective ego states are CP, CC and RC.
At birth a new-born only has one ego state, the Child ego state and it is all Free Child. Over time this changes and and the Conforming Child increases more and more as the youngster learns it has to fit in with others needs and there are rules about life. Thus as the youngster grows the Free Child gets less and less.
In western society from a psychological point of view most adults tend have too much Conforming Child. There are some groups in society who are exceptions to this and two of those is the criminal population and the drug using population. These people are not socialised enough and thus they have too much Free Child and not enough conformity to authority.
Conforming Child
The good employee is the person with good Adult function and quite a bit of Conforming Child. Those with criminal histories or drug use histories need to be more Conforming Child and less Free Child. As one moves up in an organisation more Free Child is required as the Conforming Child can only function if there is someone there telling it what to do. The Free Child has its own initiative and creativity and thus can be more in a leadership position.
Free Child
Tony White
Sunday, 15 June 2008